I Know....It's Been FOREVER!!!

I know that it has been FOREVER since I last blogged and I could give literally a million excuses as to why I haven't. But, I'll spare you all the reasonings and get down to brass tax. It has been 9 weeks since I have started this crazy battle of the bulge and I have lost a total of 28 lbs. But that isn't even the best part. I have lost over 10% body fat and over 23.75 inches!!!

I am starting to wear smaller clothes without them looking like they are too small for me. I have worn shorts and skirts above my knees. I NEVER did that before. I can wear sleeveless shirts because I am not ashamed of my "flabby" arms. On my 12 yr wedding anniversary recently my husband bought me some fabulous knee high boots and I could zip them all the way up with ease instead of struggeling with the zipper over my once huge calves.

Doriana gave us a cheat meal last Sunday since it was my anniversary and we went all out. Bob and I ordered Imo's pizza extra large with a side of cheese sticks and a 2 liter of Coke. Yummy. But, I hurt on Monday. That's for sure.

Doriana also changed up our diet for the next 2 weeks to where we are only eating protein and items with high contents of healthy fat. For instance, 1/4 cup of walnuts or an avocado with our protein. She said that she is constantly going to be "messing" with our food from now on to keep our metabolism guessing and on course. However, I really really miss carbs. Spaghetti, mashed potatoes, white rice, chips...etc. But, like Dori says, the food will be there when we are ready for it.

Our exercise program has become more intense too. We now have kickboxing classes and stadium stair climbing added to our spinning, bootcamp classes, areobics and Doriana's personal training sessions twice a week. My body is hating it but it is learning to play nice.

All in all I definetely like what I see. It is hard to imagine what I will look like when the 6 months is over and I am on maintenance. I think I look pretty good now. My biggest problem, other than the occasional craving, is keeping Bob away from me. He jokes that he is getting a trophy wife without a costly divorce.

I guess with him I'll just have to take it one day at a time.

A big shout out to my two biggest supporters. My mom and my sis!!! Love you both.

Chao!!!

Make It Burn

I am very weary. The 2 hour plus exercising everyday is taking a toll on my body. My feet, legs, arms, neck, abs and calves constantly hurt. I'm poppin Advil like candy. I decided to step up my routine by going to the gym everyday and doing an arobics or spin class for my morning excerise. And my body is feeling it.

However, since I have done this (a week ago Wednesday) I have lost an additional 5lbs!!!

I have a goal in mind. I'm in the zone. My body be damned. I will push throught. My only concern is doing it right to avoid injury.

Doriana always says that when we are lifting weights with her, "Make It Burn!" That's my moto from now on. Whatever exercise I am doing, I will Make It Burn.

I'm doin it! The results are too amazing to ignore. I will keep it up and take it one day at a time.........

1 Down...5 To Go

Yesterday we weighed in and did measurements to gauge our progress. I am very proud to say that I have lost a total of 10 lbs and 15 inches in 1 month!!! I am very happy. But, Doriana said not to expect those results every month. We should start slowing down and when we quite losing inches then she will do a change up in our diet.

After we measured then we worked out with Doriana. And man oh man did she ever work us out. She kept adding 25 lbs per set to where we could barely lift the weights. Misty and I lost our witness at the end because it was soooo hard to keep going. We were primarily working our legs and when we were done our legs were shaky and we could barely stand.

However, as we were stretching after the workout, Doriana gave us a gift. She said that she worked us extra hard because she was gonna let us have a 1 1/2 cup of PASTA!!! As a reward. I mean to tell you the pasta never tasted sooooo good. Afterwords I just sat there like a cat who ate a mouse. I can still recall the satisfaction of being "full" from the carbs. Pure contentment. I'm smiling right now thinking about it.

It's funny that that little cup and a half of pasta has boosted my morale so much that I am ready to tackle another 4 weeks head on. I felt so good about it that I got up and did a spinning class this morning.

I guess that I will continue to take it one day at a time......With results like this, how can I not.

Food Never Looked SO GOOD

The last couple of days have really been mentally hard for me. I am starting to think nasty thoughts about food. And not necessarily bad for you food. I am lusting after a peach or a piece of bread or like my friend Misty, a tall glass of cold milk. Several times I was at the brink of giving in to the overwhelming temptation only to pull myself back to reality. But, I am breaking down rapidly.

We will have been at this for 4 weeks on Wednesday and I can see some results. But, that is dangerous for me because I can easily rationalize taking a bite here or a sip there. With no end in sight to the strict diet I am starting to get really weak.

I spoke to Doriana today on the phone and she really encouraged me. She talked me down off the fence by telling me that "the food will always be there." Milk, pasta, pizza, mashed potatoes and cheesecake will be waiting for me when I am done and am on a maintenance plan. But for now I just need to stay the course and convince my brain to think differently. She assured me that there would be a free meal in my future soon but to hold out a little while longer. I have worked so hard by working out and eating right for 4 weeks and it would be a shame to regress because of a moment of weakness.

Those are the truths that are grounding me for now. I almost have to chant it over and over again when I am tempted to get me through the impulsion of eating (gorging) on yummy food.

I guess I just gotta keep taking it one day at a time. God Help Me!

Sands of Time

Okay, the header might be a little cheezy. But, time really is a fickle thing. Misty and I have been doing this for 3 weeks last Wednesday and the days are long but the weeks are flying by. Misty and I have lost a significant amount of inches in those 3 weeks and I am proud to say that as of this morning I am officially down 1 size!! Yippee!! I can still wear my old size but there is a lot of wiggle room. And my new size is a tinnee winnee tight. But in a few days they will fit great!

I've also noticed that my face is a little thinner and my waist is less pudgy.

Now that I am starting to see some results I am more eager to do the workouts with Doriana at the gym and also to take additional classes like spinning or Fred's torture class on Saturday mornings. But Ive also noticed that although in the long run, fickle Father time is my friend, he is my enemy day to day. There is NEVER enough time to do everything that I need and want to do each day. For instance, everything revolves around my exercise and eating. I have to be 100% committed to doing it right to get the results that I want. So, that means I have to compromise on literally everything else. Yesterday, my family had decided to go to the fair. My kids were especially excited about this because they were meeting friends there. However, I had a client issue and was afraid if I made my family wait for me then I would miss my work out with Doriana and Misty at 430p. So, they had to go have summer fun without me. Although it worked out for me to stay home and work/workout I still missed my family.

Also, Misty and Steve have really good friends coming into town this weekend and asked if we wanted to see a movie Friday night. To Mistys and my dismay we realized that if we went to a late movie on Friday we would kill ourselves Saturday morning in Fred's class. So, in order to keep with our exercise schedule we had to rearrange every ones schedule to accommodate ours and see it Saturday early evening. What a bummer. No more spontaneous.

I keep reminding myself that this hectic schedule is only until the middle of January. But in the dog days of summer that seems really far off.

But, I guess I'll just keep taking it one day at a time.

Spinner

The clock was my enemy. Up then down. Up then down. Sweat was pouring down my face and it had only been 5 minutes. Up again down again. June yells "three"...."up"..."two"...."down"....and repeats again and again. She finally says take a drink and do I ever. Before I know it my water is mostly gone. I need to conserve a little better and not drink like a dying man in the desert.

Up again down again to the beat of Lady Gaga. Great. Her songs always seem to last forever. "Increase your resistance!!!" yells Hilter June from the front. "Don't get lazy! Make it burn!" It was burning before I even sat down on the bike.

I'm starting to get in the groove. I'm starting to feel like Lance Armstrong biking in the Alps. I can hear June yelling "up and down" but I can't see her cuz of all the sweat pouring into my eyes. But I do notice Ms. Thing near me not giving a sweat and going up down, up down, with her perfectly shaped butt and thighs. Some day that will be me and someone else will be in the back watching me with envy.

As I am dreaming of my soon to be perfectly shaped butt and thighs, June yells, "Great Job everyone!!! Let's stretch!!"

What??!! We're done already??? I'm just getting started!!!

I'm coming back to you Hitler June!!! I felt great afterwards!!! Look out Lance. Here I come.

But, for now, I'll just take it one day at a time.

Struggle

Today I really struggled.

Doriana is out of town and can't train us so she told us to instead attend a "boot camp" style high intensity cardio/weight class that lasted 1 hour 15 min. I was doing fine until it got so overwhelming hot in there that I couldn't breathe. Plus I was kinda in the front and in between two mirrors that showed EVERYTHING I was doing. And it didn't help that everyone else in the class was totally awesome and looked amazing.

Those that know me know that I hardly ever cry. Let alone in front on anyone else. And I am very competitive. I'm usually a pretty confident person but all these emotions just hit me plus I couldn't breathe and started to hyperventilate. So, I stepped outside for a moment to catch my breath. Normally, I would just go back in, no problem. But today, I felt like a TOTAL loser. Noone else was leaving or "wussin" out but me. The enormity of the situation overwhelmed me. The struggle to lose weight the healthy way just seemed too damn hard. I realized that I had a long way to go. I just sat down and cried. In that moment I was a split second from leaving. I have been working so hard by eating exactly what Doriana & Gerrad have said to eat and exercised at least 2 hours a day. And I still looked like a fat ass trying to keep up with the hotties.

Worst of all, I could still hear everyone in the class giving it their all while I sat outside and felt sorry for myself. To my imagination I knew everyone in the class was wondering if the "fat girl" would be okay and if she would come back.

I immediately recognized one of my food triggers. While I was crying and convincing myself that I could not continue on, I started craving food. Strongly.

But The Lord whispered in my ear that I was Beautiful and that my husband loves me deeply. And my friend Misty couldn't do it without me by her side (nor I her). We were in this together. It took years to put on the weight and no one said it would be easy. In fact, Gerrad specifically told me that it would be really hard.

Somehow I wiped the tears streaming down my face and marched right back in there and finished. I still felt ashamed and discouraged.

After the class I went back out to that same bench and cried again. Later that morning, I told Misty and my husband how I had felt and cried again. Gradually though, I was able to pull through and I let truth wash over me.

I'm still not 100% myself and occasionally fall back into negative thoughts, but really there is no other choice but to go up. Quiting is not an option for me. I can never go back down. Ever.

So, tomorrow as I continue.....I'll just take it one day at a time.